ph0enix

One week after my last blog entry, I’ve lost the 2 pounds needed to hit my mini-goal. 50 POUNDS LOST SO FAR! I could not be more excited to celebrate this milestone.

Last night, for the first time in 20 years, I stood on the pitcher’s mound during softball practice. Granted, I haven’t been overweight for the past 20 years, but it was a huge accomplishment. To even be asked to play again was quite flattering. And quite honestly, I didn’t know I could move like that anymore…but I did!!!

Things I notice are easier with so much weight gone: mounting and riding my horse, training my mule, running, getting in and out of my truck, staying active, not napping during the day, dealing with the depression that accompanies my migraines, getting out of the house to find help managing my migraines, feeling good about myself, feeling attractive again, not being a recluse, socializing with friends and strangers, bending to tie my shoes. That’s one I just noticed last night. And I can once again cross my legs to sit like a lady.

It’s funny the things we take for granted, both when we’re at a healthy weight and when we’re overweight. To help with the shoulder injuries I’ve been nursing without medical intervention, I’ve started belly dancing lessons. It is low-impact for the arms, but certainly keeps them moving. Soon I’ll advance to working the core of my body, which is finally starting to get shape back to it. I can once again see my curves - and I have form to my butt, rather than just a lump for me to sit on.

What’s amazed me most about my backside is that my brother was the first to notice…”um, sis, you’re gonna need some new jeans because your butt seems to be shrinking.” Even when I weighed 117 pounds, he always called me a cow - more because I collected them than because he thought I was fat.  When I got sick and had to endure Prednisone for a year, he became my biggest supporter. Next spring I am in his wedding (another big motivator to prove that yes, I can do this and I can do it naturally) and could not be more proud. Of course when I hit this mini-goal, though losing 50 pounds is more than a little bump in the road I’ve shuffled over, he was the first to know. I hate admitting “I’m finally under 200 pounds” but at the same time I am so very proud. In fact, when I hit 199, I told my husband we needed a new digital scale because ours was clearly broken. He couldn’t figure out what had happened to it. I said, “It has to be broken. There’s no ‘2′ in front of my weight anymore.” How excited our house has been with my progress, especially this past week.

Thank you to my buddies for getting me this far. I have 50 more to go, so keep the support coming. I’m not about to quit now!

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I haven’t made huge amounts of progress the past few months, but I’m 2 pounds away from my next mini goal. So close I can taste it, and it tastes like a small victory!

I have a new motivation, though, as I’ve been asked to be a bridesmaid in my brother’s wedding next year. The dress has been ordered 2 sizes smaller than I’d anticipated! If I wasn’t so, um, blessed in the chest, it’d been 3 sizes. I couldn’t believe it.

I still have a ways to go to reach a healthy weight, but am definitely on the right track.

I’ve been stuck on this crazy plateau for 6 months and I’m ready to move on. 3 more pounds to my next mini-goal. I stay motivated because, even though the scale hasn’t budged, my clothes keep getting bigger. Wondering if I’m toning some muscle that’s making my weight stay the same. I’ve lost several inches between my arms, thighs, waist and hips, so I have to stay positive. Something’s working!

I couldn’t believe when I stepped on the scale this morning and had lost 2 more pounds since last week.  Unbelievable because, in the process of remodeling and getting ready to move into a new house, we’ve been hitting the fast food joints like they’re going out of style.  But, all of the remodeling work has been very physical and my body definitely feels every bit of it.  Five more pounds to go to reach my 3rd goal and finally be back under 200 pounds!!!  I’m hoping to do this before the end of the year, but am not pressuring myself.  Once I hit that goal, I’ll be home free…maybe!

Merry Christmas to everyBUDDY and thank you so much for your support this year.  With your encouragement and well wishes, I’ve been able to lose 45 pounds since January 1, 2009!!!

My BMI has dropped 6 points since I joined Buddy Slim in December 2008!  I’m still 12 points higher than I should be, but I’m making progress.  38 pounds lost so far and I couldn’t be more excited!

I finally made it to my second goal and hope to quickly achieve my third goal.  I have to lose 16 more pounds to get there, which will put me at almost the 1/2 way point of my desired weight loss.  I’m so excited.  With the weather being warmer, my family not using central air this year, and working more with the horses and mules… I’ve been sweating off the pounds, slowly but surely.  I can’t wait to post again (with an updated picture) when I’ve achieved my third goal. Wish me luck!

As of December 10, 2008, I had gained 70 pounds from the medications I was taking for migraines, anxiety and depression, and from doing nothing but sleeping all day every day (because of the meds). I took those medications for exactly 1 year before I boldly told my doctor I’d had enough of them and they weren’t helping me… I went off of them all. Yesterday, after tediously weighing myself once a week every week, I have lost 25 of those 70 pounds. I am ecstatic!!! I am slowly moving closer and closer to my goal weight. I have a long way to go, because I needed to lose even before gaining that 70 additional pounds, but I am doing it and I couldn’t be happier!

I finally reached my first mini-goal today!!!!!

Last night I walked outside to take in the full moon just before midnight.  It was beautiful.  For whatever reason, at that very moment, I was moved to ask God to be more present in my life.  I’ve been Catholic my entire life, but have been very wishy-washy about living my faith, and I guess I just needed a reminder that He does indeed still love me and is always there with me.  Granted, I wasn’t feeling well today after a sleepless night and took a longer nap than I should have just to get me through the day, but I woke up feeling completely rejuvenated.  I’ve only said one “bad word” all day (one of my big vices), haven’t had any caffeine (Mt. Dew and I are old friends), and found this site filled with amazing people.  I can’t believe the support I’ve received within just a few short hours of registering, and I want to thank everyone who has made me feel welcome.  I know I can accomplish my goals, but I also know I am human and will stumble along the way.  What a wonderful feeling to know there will be people who understand what I am going through to pick me up when I fall.  The Lord does work in mysterious ways!!!

December 10, 2007 was the start of the worst migraine I’d had in my then 7-year history of migraines.  That one lasted until I got a 4-hour break from it on January 1, 2008.  That 4 hours was the greatest I’d felt in a very long time.  Then it started again.  Since that time, I’ve been on 12 different medications, had 2 sleep studies, completed bio-feedback and alpha stimulation therapy, lost my job as a supervisor for a nationwide company, and gained too much weight from the medications and lack of activity.  On December 10, 2008, I decided I’d had enough of the side effects from my medications and felt they were holding me back from being myself.  Things were starting to get very tense in my marriage and my relationship with my daughter because I was no longer my independent self - I hadn’t been in a year!  I was tired of depending on everyone else to drive me, make my decisions, watch over me.  So I slowly took myself off all of my medications and became much more active in my daily life.  I am now able to care for my horse all by myself again, which is great exercise.  Santa brought us a Wii for Christmas - the best motivator I’ve ever had because it’s fun and makes me be physically active.  Since the first of 2009, I’ve lost 8 pounds.  I haven’t seriously altered the way I eat, I’m just ACTIVE again.  Probably more active than I’ve been in years, and I am loving it! The best feeling of all is that I am no longer dependent on everyone else, I am spending more time with my daughter, and my husband is 100% supportive without feeling the burden of my neediness any longer.